Episode 7: Drunk or Drama?

Learning when to slow down, when to step back and when to say “WHEN!”

Even savvy Swingers can’t always avoid drama. In situations when things may not be going exactly as planned, just realizing when to slow down, when to step back and knowing when to say “when” can help keep you from stepping on landmines and getting caught up in some drama.

But, we’re the Accidental Swingers and, as usual, we learned these lessons the hard way. 

Three crazy dates in a row

We talk about three back to back dates with different couples that we had over a three week period. We learn the value of trusting your instincts and the importance of sticking to the plan.  Unfortunately we didn’t know any better and flubbed our way through some uncomfortable situations!  

The first date – A vanilla date with a lifestyle couple turns into a playdate, that, honestly, should have stayed a vanilla date.

The second date – In a moment of weakness, Myrina ignores her inner voice and allows a meet and greet date to turn into a playdate.  Consequently, things end up going downhill, fast. We should have stayed at the bar!

The third date – After very successful vanilla and playdates, we run into some drama with the wife of one of the couples that we play with.

This entire three-week period was a real growth experience for us. And we finally understand the bottom line: couples are hard. Drama is not something that swingers look for but the reality is, it will probably happen. We are all human, humans have feelings, feelings get hurt.

Lucky number four

Finally a fun, hot, sexy story to tell!

As always, we talk about what we could have done, we laugh at our mistakes and vow to do better next time!  

In this episode:

  • episode 7, lucky number 7, isn’t so lucky for the Accidental Swingers!
  • the importance of “being organic” and being able to “go with the flow”
  • the on-going theme of “What to do when things don’t go the way you think they’re going to go!”
  • signals and signs that couples use to communicate a thumbs up or down for the potential playmate/s
  • Myrina gets a six-hand massage
  • women in the lifestyle get their periods, it’s just going to happen
  • one of our go-to stories in the lifestyle for how shit can go wrong
  • Myrina confesses to wearing “granny panties”
  • The “Alexa” wars
  • we run into some drama with one of the couples we’ve been seeing
  • Myrina has her first orgasm with someone other than Tristan in 28 years
  • couples can be tough and sometimes drama happens
  • Tristan encourages Myrina to have a solo playdate with a single man
  • Myrina’s first solo playdate with a single man
  • we start getting ready for New Orleans!

“But I’m a lady, dammit! I didn’t want him thinking I was some whore that someone can just pick up and f*&k during the day!”

~ Myrina, Episode 7 [75:37]


COMPERSION – (from Wiktionary) – Vicarious joy associated with seeing one’s partner have a joyful, romantic or sexual relation with another.

Some consider compersion the opposite of jealousy.


  • Couples tend to have signals and signs when meeting prospective playdates [05:00]

The First Date

  • “Let’s just jump right in and start talking about what was going on with us.” [06:24]
  • AUDIO CLIP #1 – recorded June 2018 [09:33]
  • “We didn’t see that coming.” [17:46]
  • Myrina’s drinking before play “guideline” [19:12]
  • Sometimes it’s just better to stop [21:08]
  • The takeaway from this experience [22:37]

The Second Date

  • “Even the best made plans sometimes will get thwarted by Mother Nature [23:09]
Tristan’s Bubble Chart [23:21]

  • Tristan’s Bubble Chart – Myrina can’t be trusted intersects with We should really put the brakes on this intersects with Tristan really is a sucker for a beautiful woman with a southern accent creates the ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE scenario [23:21]
  • THE BACKGROUND [24:35]
  • We should have had a signal! [30:55]
  • THE STORY (Unfortunately the audio for this was too poor to clean up and try to include) [33:05]
  • Myrina decides she will surprise Tristan when he gets there with the wife by being “otherwise occupied” with the husband [33:26]
  • Does Tristan lose his mojo?? [38:52]
  • The important lessons we learned [39:49]
  • A possible theory as to why things went the way they did [43:51]
  • Quick re-cap of what went wrong! [46:32]

The Third Date

  • The drama that ensued [47:20]
  • Normally what we do when we go to a mixer … [49:49]
  • Myrina hates people asking her what she “likes” [52:14]
  • The first time Myrina orgasms with a lifestyle partner! [53:10]
  • Some drama had begun, and we knew it but we didn’t understand it [56:56]
  • AUDIO CLIP #2 – recorded July 2018 [58:14]
  • The first time we really hit a wall with a couple [69:46]

The Fourth Date

  • We’re going to end on a high note! [71:02]
  • A quick recap from meeting this single guy in Episode 6: Sexual Swinging vs. Social Swinging [71:33]
  • Myrina’s solo playdate with a single man [74:08]
  • “But I’m a lady, dammit!” [75:37]
  • Myrina finally has her solo playdate and it was WONDERFUL!!!!! [76:16]
  • This was a big step for us, in you offering that style of play [77:24]
  • “I had fantasized for a long time about you going off and being a hot wife.” [77:38]
  • This all leads up to our experience in New Orleans! [79:59]

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